Thursday, December 23, 2010
This is Corina at age 3, singing It's Oh So Quiet. If you're so pressed for time that you don't have the full 4 minutes, do yourself a favour and at least watch from 2:38 to 3:05. They say laughter is the best medicine, but they're wrong. Toddlers singing Bjork songs is the best medicine.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
less TV, more reading
less shopping, more outdoors
less clutter, more space
less rush, more slowness
less consuming, more creating
less junk, more real food
less busywork, more impact
less driving, more walking
less noise, more solitude
less focus on the future, more on the present
less work, more play
less worry, more smiles
I can do this.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
My mom gave us her Blue Willow china, which I totally am in love with. Today we toured Eldon House (London's oldest house, now a museum containing nearly 90% original furnishings) and saw our very own Blue Willow china prominently displayed in the dining room and kitchen. The tour guide told us the story of the picture, which seems like something I should have known.
Blue Willow china was introduced in the late 1700s and illustrates a love story! (Gag.)
The Willow Legend
There was once a Mandarin who had a beautiful daughter, Koong-se. He employed a secretary, Chang who, while he was attending to his master's accounts, fell in love with Koong-se, much to the anger of the Mandarin, who regarded the secretary as unworthy of his daughter.
|The secretary was banished and a fence constructed around the gardens of the Mandarin's estate so that Chang could not see his daughter and Koong-se could only walk in the gardens and to the water's edge. |
One day a shell fitted with sails containing a poem, and a bead which Koong-se had given to Chang, floated to the water's edge. Koong-se knew that her lover was not far away.
|She was soon dismayed to learn that she had been betrothed to Ta-jin, a noble warrior Duke. She was full of despair when it was announced that her future husband, the noble Duke, was arriving, bearing a gift of jewels to celebrate his betrothal. |
|However, after the banquet, borrowing the robes of a servant, Chang passed through the guests unseen and came to Koong-se's room. They embraced and vowed to run away together. The Mandarin, the Duke, the guests, and all the servants had drunk so much wine that the couple almost got away without detection, but Koong-se's father saw her at the last minute and gave chase across the bridge. |
|The couple escaped and stayed with the maid that Koong-se's father had dismissed for conspiring with the lovers. Koong-se had given the casket of jewels to Chang and the Mandarin, who was also a magistrate, swore that he would use the jewels as a pretext to execute Chang when he caught him. |
|One night the Mandarin's spies reported that a man was hiding in a house by the river and the Mandarin's guards raided the house. But Chang had jumped into the ragging torrent and Koong-se thought that he had drowned. |
Some days later the guards returned to search the house again. While Koong-se's maid talked to them, Chang came by boat to the window and took Koong-se away to safety.
|They settled on a distant island, and over the years Chang became famous for his writings. This was to prove his undoing. The Mandarin heard about him and sent guards to destroy him. Chang was put to the sword and Koong-se set fire to the house while she was still inside. |
Friday, July 16, 2010
Car things: my car insurance tripled in Ontario. Hate. There are approximately 132 hoops through which to jump to get licensed, insured, and registered in Ontario. Today I was exchanging my Alberta license for an Ontario one. After more than 2 hours in line (!!) I handed over my license, my passport, and filled out the paperwork. Then I signed the paperwork.
"Sorry...your signature is wrong. It doesn't match the one on your passport because it's too loopy. You have to do it again."
I did it again. It was still wrong. I wish I was exaggerating, but she made me do my signature at least 20 times.
Me: But I'm the one doing my signature...it's obviously right!
Her: But maybe it's not you. Maybe you're forging.
Me: But you have two pieces of government photo ID! What's harder, forging a signature, or forging a face?
Her: But the pictures are in black and white.
Anyway, after the 20 or so attempts, I finally got my own signature right and she believed it was me. Because, you know, when someone takes that long to get their signature right, it's clearly them.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
How to Make a Sandwich on the Island
1. Gather ingredients
2. Point gun at ingredients and shout “HOW DO I MAKE A SANDWICH OUT OF YOU?!?!?”
3. Breathe heavily through your nose as though you were about to hit ingredients
4. Give up and make the sandwich yourself, and eat it bitterly
1. Make separate sandwiches, one with peanut butter and one with jelly
2. Take a bite of the peanut butter sandwich, declaring it the best
3. Take a bite of the jelly sandwich, declaring it the best
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 ad infinitum
5. Follow peanut butter or jelly sandwich into grave danger
1. Throw the jar of jelly at wall, sneering “I don’t need no sandwich”
2. Call the mascot on the jar of peanut butter lots of clever nicknames
3. Huff and puff and stomp around and grumble a lot
4. When no one’s looking, make perfect, even, symmetrical peanut butter and jelly sandwich and sit in a corner, enjoying every bite
1. Sit idly by, believing that the ingredients will find a way to make a sandwich out of themselves
2. Lose faith and make the sandwich anyway
3. Realize that you were the instrument by which the ingredients chose to make a sandwich after all
4. Run around the room and grab everyone’s knives, insisting that their sandwiches will do the same in time
1. Make sandwich
2. Eat sandwich
3. Repeat steps 1 and 2 ad infinitum
1. Procure 23 milligrams of uranium-20
2. Set hadron supercollider to eight megajoules
3. Program a sandwich-making macro using Cobol or Visual Basic
4. Act all tough-like
1. Eat sandwich
2. Call the sandwich “brother”
3. Place peanut butter slice over jelly slice
4. Spread jelly on the other slice
5. Spread peanut butter on one slice
6. Take two slices of bread, a jar of peanut butter and a jar of jelly
1. Steal someone else’s sandwich
2. Claim you coerced them into making the sandwich for you all along
3. Say you’ll tell them everything if they make you another sandwich
4. Stare at them all creepy-like
1. Lay out plans for one of the most intricate, fascinating, and delicious sandwiches of all time
2. Just as you start making it, get shot
1. Apply peanut butter
2. Disappear for eight months
3. Apply jelly
4. Disappear for eight months
5. Eat sandwich
1. Mmmmmmm, peanut butter
Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse
1. Make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich
2. Have someone take a bite, then tell them it’s a baloney sandwich
3. Make up a whole bunch of other shit, then say you had planned it all along
4. Buy a few yachts
What are we at now...23 days until Lost is back? Yay!
Friday, January 01, 2010
Top Ten NKOTB Members of 2009.